Hell on Earth

So here it was, Friday, the end of the work week, time to relax and enjoy a beer with dinner and recover from the rat race. But NO. Virginia, along with several other states, has thrown a dagger into the mix. TAX FREE WEEKEND. Of course my wife, Eva Save-Alittle decides we need to save some tax money. We head out to the mall and of course we have to have dinner while we are out. I avoid the high-end restaurants and manage to convince her the herd can survive on mall food. We begin shopping. Store after no air-conditioned store and we still cannot find any shoes for the womenfolk in our brood.

We move away from the mall and head over to the other horrible shopping entity in town. At least we are going to Kohls and I can get something for myself. They are having an all night sale. Guess who is not getting home anytime soon?

Then the second dagger hits home. As we cruise by the teacher store, the wife needs to go in JUST FOR A SECOND. That is when I spy Turtle lady. She is one of the wife's best friends and the slowest creature on Earth. I try to intercept the eye contact but to no avail. This time I just sat in the vehicle while the kids watched a movie and the wife gabbed and shopped. Eons later we are off again.

Kohls is a great store. I love it. It is cheap and I like the stuff. But, damn, it is always crowded. We get there after 8ish and it is mobbed. No carts, a bad sign. We split up and I have the oldest boy go steal a cart from someone that has turned their back. Sneaky, sneaky. We somehow escape after almost two hours. Still no shoes for the girls. The wife found some of course.

On the way home, we are again detoured. The HOT light was on at Krispy Kreme. We snag a few boxes and get the kids home and in bed by 10ish. Then I pass out in the chair from exhaustion.

Sooooo, to save myself $10 from the state, it cost me a couple hundred in clothes, probably about $30 in mall food and $10 in doughnuts. Not to mention the gallons and gallons of $3.00 a gallon gas we guzzled. All in all a good night of savings.


On to other news. Miss-leave-the-group-and-move-to-the-south now has a blog. Check it out at traitor.com. OK. Maybe that isn't the real name. Turns out she rolled at a good time. The band is breaking up and the glory days are almost over. Seriously, just click on the link and visit her dog-love page. Or whatever it is.

Another year goes by without me making it to the Maine Lobster Festival. Maybe next year.