Well the weekend that started with a shopping spree until the late hours of Friday night only got better. Saturday morning called for a trip to Potomac Mills Mall. If you are not familiar with this place, imagine a long one-story mall spread out over most of the length of an entire county. And now imagine that monstrosity gorged to its gills with people. Lots and lots of people. And must I remind you that I am not overly fond of people.
We only spent a few hours in this hell hole but a few hours in a mall with a bunch of children seems like forever. I kept a cheery face though, being the good husband and father that I am.
Later we rolled up on my parents to mooch a free meal. Right after dinner we moved to the television room and I saw one of the greatest television programs ever. It was a Bratwurst eating championship from Wisconsin. The master of jamming weiners down his throat, Takeru "Tsunami" Kobayashi set a new world record. It was incredible. I have found my calling. When I retire, I am hitting the competitive eating tour.
During the after meal festivities my father and my son are throwing a semi soft rubber ball at each other. Harmless enough until the little monster (not my dad, he would be the older grumpy monster) beans me in the eye with the damn ball. Great, I know eye surgery is in my future. Fortunately I escaped with blurred vision and a headache.
Sunday brought church and a relaxing day. I did a little housework, watched the race and took a nap. Perfect day. Oh except for the fact that I broke a tooth during dinner. Bit into an olive and hit a pit. Now I have to visit the dentist today.
If that isn't enough for one weekend, I spoke to Lumpy today. He is always good for a laugh or two. Turns out he and his lovely bride were boozing it up and some snobby affair and fatboy drops a funnel cake on the ground. No stranger to squeezing blood from a stone, Lumpy picks up the mud covered cake and deposits it in his piehole. What a site he must have been. I can only say, 'Lumpy you are the man'.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment