I took off a couple days last week and made a long weekend of it. I took the wife on a little vacation without most of the children. Those spawn I left in the care of my parents. I have not heard from the parents since I let them escape the house. I keep calling but they don't answer. I suppose I will have to cross them off the babysitter list. We went to Williamsburg. Not a distant trip but far enough just the same. The wonderful wife was excited about not having to make breakfast for the kids and being able to enjoy the hotel's continental breakfast at her leisure. Of course we just botched that whole thing on the first morning and slept right through breakfast. I had no problem with that, ten straight hours of sleep is sweet. She was bitter. We tooled around town, shopped, and napped.
Here are some pics of cows at the local outlet mall. I do not know why they were there but they were so I took the pics.
One night we were trying to get our meal on and stopped at the Outback. It was full as Outbacks usually are. The wife needed to breastfeed, so we parked in the carryout space and she starts feeding as I pull out the laptop and search for a hot spot. Along comes slim and taps on the window to find out if we needed a carryout order as he gawks at the boob. You figure he gets his peek on and rolls, right? No, not slimmy, he waits a few and comes back for a little more teet. He taps again, asking us to move so a carryout customer can park there. The wife informs him that she is in the middle of something and we will move just as soon as humanly possibly. He grabs another eyeful and splits.
We ended up at some high dollar, over priced seafood joint. The best part was watching this group of necks and their spawn roll in. I knew they were out of their league so I watched in enjoyment. They ordered beers and drinks and then opened the menus. They got up and walked out shortly after noticing there was no hamburgers or corn dogs on the menu. Fancy little waiter boy got a kick out of this too.
The highlight of the trip had to be on the way home. There was a traffic jam on I-64 and we were cruising slowly down the road when I spied something off to the right. Perhaps this was the cause of the backup, a tractor trailer on the side of the road. No, the jam extended further. But as I glance back at the rig, i notice that Ace the driver is on the other side doing his business. How do I know this? Because from under the truck you can his white ass bent over and what is that? Brownies??? No!!! A big pile of shit on the highway. Not even gonna step into the woods?? Nope, not him. Squat on the shoulder. Nice. Unfortunately traffic was moving just a little too fast or I would have snapped a pic for your amusement.
I have some more pics I will get up shortly. There was this old dude that thought he was a punk rocker. Scary. Lumpy has sent pics of the world's strongest motorcycle. It holds his wide body up so it must be tough. I also have pics of my visit to RFK for the Nats game.
Let me tell you real quickly about that. Kids birthday party. For me that means Chucky Cheese or Fun Land or Build a Bear. Not anymore. Just tell your major league baseball team that your kid has peanut allergies and they will hook you. We had 20 some kids and a dozen adults in a luxury box at the game.
Real nice. We had to keep the allergic kids away from the peanuts and me away from the horrible things you call other people. I took my youngest son to the very top of the stadium to show him where we would be sitting if daddy had to buy the tickets.
From now on, we walk around with Just Say No To Nuts shirts and Nationals hats. I can no longer sit with the common folk now that I have stepped over the line.
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