Lumpy and the Bird

After looking at these pictures from Lumpy, I can conclude a couple of disturbing things.

1. Obviously food tastes good in the midwest because Lumpy doesn't look anorexic.

2. Despite what most of you are thinking, that whole bearded look really, really works for him.

3. Firepits = Fun for Wisconsinites.

4. There are about a dozen working stiffs in that neighborhood that thought they had done good for their family. They had worked 60 hour weeks to get a nice house in a nice upper middle class midwest neighborhood. They had avoided life's traps, gambling, drugs, alcohol. They had made something of themselves. Then they wake up on a glorious Thanksgiving morning, appreciating their life even more. Until they throw back the shades and see Lumpy in his Packers jacket smoking from the hookah and swilling beer at seven in the morning. Where did it all go wrong?

Babies Everywhere

There is another baby in the family. Guess what?? Again, it is not mine. This is great. My sister had her first tonight. She hasn't named him yet so I am going with Leroy. Maybe it will catch on. And Captain Redneck is going to be a grandfather yet again. Those hillbillies are breeding almost as quick as my family.

Post Bird

I was waiting for Lumpy to send me pictures before I posted this but he has failed me again. Supposedly he fried a turkey and smoked a turkey for Thanksgiving. He said they turned out well but, alas, no pictures.

My Thanksgiving was actually good. Any time you have to go on the road, there is always the possibility of static. We had to travel to the Nosaj house for the second time in a week. (Actually went a third time for turkey soup on Sunday night) We wisely waited until the Green Bay game was over before we made the five minute trek. If you remember last year, we ran out of gas on the same five minute trek. Fortunately the wife didn't leave us on empty this year.

The food was good and there were no issues or battles. And Nosaj actually had good beer, Heineken. Of course, the father in law complained. That is what he does best.

So let's get to the funny stuff that everybody likes. I got my car inspected but it failed for front tires, so now I am sporting a big rejection sticker. I plan on waiting the full 15 days before I get them fixed. The wife's grandmother said I looked like I gained weight. Not like I haven't seen this crazy old woman in a while, it had only been a couple weeks, so I told her politely to bite my ass. Nosaj bought a fire pit for the back yard. But he couldn't afford any friends so he sits out there at night, starts a fire, gets a chair from the deck and drinks beer and surfs the web in the middle of his yard. You can take the boy out of Wisconsin, but you can't take the Wisconsin out of the boy.

Here are some pictures of my time off.

Me, the wife, and Nosaj enjoying some bird.



Results of letting the crazy old lady put the pie away.



Hey, one of these kids is actually not mine.



Haha. No one is watching me.



Sunset at Nosaj's house.



The Nosaj bird.



The leaves turning colors on Skyline Drive?



NO. Just a fall day before all these friggin leaves cover my yard, which they did, they very next day.

Before the Holiday

I am not sure if I mentioned it or not, but the McRib is back. I have had six since I found out two weeks ago. I have to keep this body going somehow. Speaking of eating, I attended my niece's birthday party yesterday at Nosaj's house. He actually had decent beer and food. I kept waiting for him to fire up the grill but I guess finger food is better than no food. To his defense, he was all sore and in pain. He said it was from working, but the father-in-law had just whooped his ass on the golf course. So I have to assume that the injury was all for show. Regardless, the food was sufficient. Turkey day is also at the Nosaj mansion and I am going to be HUNGRY, so I hope he doesn't burn the bird.

Saturday Night Fever

Here are the scary pictures from our 70's Murder Mystery party over the weekend. As you can see, the local Goodwill made a killing off of us. And Beer makes you think you look less foolish than you really do.

In Memory of Sebastian

Saturday our cat Sebastian went to the great scratching post in the sky. He will be missed.



This is an older picture of the man. He is in the center.

Aaron Jones

Ever heard of Aaron Jones? You will. Just like when you saw that crazy video on late night MTV with this girl in the Catholic school uniform. You said wow this is new, this is a catchy tune. A month or two later and Britney was ruling the world. This is that same thing. You are catching Aaron on the way up. He is a truly remarkable singer and spoken worder. Check out his Myspace pages. He sings Sparks and Long Way Home. All the spoken word tunes are him too. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Maybe we can convince him to release an album.

Aaron Jones the singer.

Aaron Jones the spoken worder.

The World is Turning Gay

Last week J.K. Rowling announced that Dumbledore is gay. Now this hag hasn't made enough money, she needs to invite the homosexual crowd to the table? Does everyone in the world have to be gay now? Is that where we are headed? Take a look at this picture. This wedding couldn't be more gay if it was two dudes getting married in a sausage factory while watching Will and Grace. Don't they have anything better to do in Wisconsin?

Pics for a Friday

SteelerFanBoy loves him some Photoshop. Here we have his latest work. Or is it real? For some reason, I can really see The Schweet wearing that suit.Supposedly



This is The Schweet on Halloween going to the big boy/girl mixer.


This is The Sandwich Artist at the same mixer. There was a rumor that he had a girlfriend recently but it was unconfirmed.



Although it is not racially sensitive, Chuey looks dapper in his sombrero.