Poly wanna graph??

I cannot divulge too many details but let us just say that Bird Flu man has some issues. To speak too much about this subject might be an infringement into his demon-filled past. We will dance around the facts that he has been asked for a return visit to the great troothsayer. There are skeletons doing Da Butt all over his closet. There is stuff in there you wouldn't even put on Cinemax Latenite.
Here is another topic, not so controversial: The extended, non-lunch. You know, the two-hour lunch break that doesn't seem to ever get made up. You know who I am talking to, Mr. working the Manpleaser sandwich and nursing a tea for 120 minutes of company time. Yes you. Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. I am fine with it. I mean, all the rest of us should have to put in our 40 hours while AT the office not at Don Munchious or The Lobster Hut. YOU, however, should be excluded. You know what, why don't you, when you decide to stroll back to the office, work a couple games of BEDAZZLINGJEWELS in for good measure. We will take up the slack. By the way, you shouldn't be worried about your visit to the troothsayer. No, not you.
Lastly, I got a call from Lumpy today. He seemed in good spirits. And by good spirits, I mean he hasn't actually ended his life yet today. Dude was bringing me down. Described a great parade he went to, and the highlight of his weekend was taking a dump in a public toilet. I hope the boy finds a friend soon, or lets Jesus into his life. WWJD? He would probably go out and meet some people and turn off the darn video games and television. No more PTI. Tony and Mike are not your friends. The guy next door that waves everyday is a real guy. Talk to him. Just don't mention too much of your Dahlmeresque Wisconsinite past.