The other night I was trying to coax my youngest son to sleep. He wanted me to rub his back. So I am talking to him and he interrupts with 'I said RUB not SCRATCH'. Oh. Then I ask him if I can have his back to take to work since mine has been hurting lately and he could keep mine for the day. He tells me 'No daddy, your back is too hairy'. Oh.
Our youngest one is starting to put sentences together. Most of them concern her favorite person in the whole world. She gives me gems like when I ask her if she is ready to go to sleep 'No daddy' or almost any time of the day I might hear 'Daddy bad' or 'Daddy get yogurt'.
How is that I go to replace burned out lights in a ceiling fan that has a glass covering that has to be unscrewed and there are no bulbs in there that NOBODY knows what happened? Now I know I live in a backwards area but I really don't see a thief going through all that trouble to get my bulbs. Eventually the culprit was outed by a sibling. Their response? 'Oh those bulbs'.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Catching You Up
Ahhhhhh. It has been like forever since I last wrote. But really nothing has gone on in our quiet little abode. Our entire family went through the flu a few weeks ago and survived. This time the Hawkman and his family were not around so I cannot blame them for this illness. Although they might have sent a gift through the mail that contained the airborne disease. Who knows?
Speaking of mail. My mom made a nice gesture by getting all the kids Valentine’s Day cards and signed them from their little cousin. Ain’t that sweet. Well it would have been if she didn’t try to cheat the postal system. She threw these lead laden objects in the mail with a regular postage stamp. Uncle Sam, instead of returning these underfunded letters, delivered them to me postage due. Nothing says Happy Valentine’s day like a disgruntled mailman demanding three bucks. So I see that the letters are from my nephew so I call my sister to bitch at her. She just laughs like it is the funniest thing in the world and points me to the mother figure.
The dog is still alive. That is a big accomplishment for her considering she whines all night. When I say all night, I really mean any time we go near her cage. She is a whiny little beast. Hopefully that will change as she gets older. IF she gets older.
Speaking of mail. My mom made a nice gesture by getting all the kids Valentine’s Day cards and signed them from their little cousin. Ain’t that sweet. Well it would have been if she didn’t try to cheat the postal system. She threw these lead laden objects in the mail with a regular postage stamp. Uncle Sam, instead of returning these underfunded letters, delivered them to me postage due. Nothing says Happy Valentine’s day like a disgruntled mailman demanding three bucks. So I see that the letters are from my nephew so I call my sister to bitch at her. She just laughs like it is the funniest thing in the world and points me to the mother figure.
The dog is still alive. That is a big accomplishment for her considering she whines all night. When I say all night, I really mean any time we go near her cage. She is a whiny little beast. Hopefully that will change as she gets older. IF she gets older.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Green Jiggy
A few weeks ago we had a party for one of the banshees. I decided the day before that we would start to recycle. The kids have been drinking more and more water in the plastic bottles. I figured I would do my part and save the Earth. So I hounded people the entire day to recycle their beer bottles and soda cans and such. I pulled bottles out of the trash and put them in the recycling bucket in the garage. Then the next day I take my heaping mound of Earth saving goodness to the dump. I can't find the plastic recycling bin. I ask. Just throw it in the trash bin. What?? We don't recycle plastic here. Are you kidding me? I was furious. So yesterday before my big Superbowl bash, I went to the dump. While I was there, I asked the dude about getting a plastic recycling bin. He pointed across the parking lot to a brand new recycling bin. Fast results. So of course, I hounded everyone at the party yesterday to recycle.
Now on to the party. We had 30 people over to the crib for a little football. Most were kids of course. One family actually bailed on us so 30 was less than what we planned for. It all went rather smoothly. Most of the kids played Dance, Dance Revolution for a good portion of the game. At different times there were a dozen children running through the dark in the front yard. I think they all came back. No one claimed they were missing a kid. The only downside to watching football with homeschool families, questions like this. Brady was getting sacked and a fumble was forced. One of the dads asked if that shouldn't be pass interference. Of course, trying to be helpful, I just smiled and said yes it should have been.
I will work on getting some audio of this new puppy. This beast makes the craziest whining noises when she is in the cage. It is insane.
The bowling boy is getting better. So I thought I would slam his other hand in the car door. He was getting in the back seat, I was shutting the front door. Should not have been a problem. Somehow he had his hand out of his open door and into the door slot for the front door. It cut a finger and he cried but no hospital visit. I am definitely moving up the list of horrible parents.
I got my car back after a month. Looks all shiny and clean. I think I even got a fancier looking dash. Could be that it is just clean. Who knows. Watch out deer. You have been warned.
Lastly my back was jacked up last week. I was down for a couple days. On Saturday the wife took all the kids to hockey and I laid on the couch with a heating pad and the dog and watched tv. It was nice. Back still hurt. So that afternoon I went to the store and bought a Salonpas back pad. It is like a huge bandaid that gets hot and supposedly makes you feel better. It might have worked, who knows. But I know when the wife tried to unstick this thing from my back, I almost died. The pain it caused, was horrible. She was pulling it off at an inch at a time rate. I was yelling at her and she was laughing. Finally I pushed her away and yanked this infernal thing off in one fell swoop. Steve Carell in the 40 Year Old Virgin had nothing on this. Needless to say, the other two pads I bought are still in the wrapper.
Now on to the party. We had 30 people over to the crib for a little football. Most were kids of course. One family actually bailed on us so 30 was less than what we planned for. It all went rather smoothly. Most of the kids played Dance, Dance Revolution for a good portion of the game. At different times there were a dozen children running through the dark in the front yard. I think they all came back. No one claimed they were missing a kid. The only downside to watching football with homeschool families, questions like this. Brady was getting sacked and a fumble was forced. One of the dads asked if that shouldn't be pass interference. Of course, trying to be helpful, I just smiled and said yes it should have been.
I will work on getting some audio of this new puppy. This beast makes the craziest whining noises when she is in the cage. It is insane.
The bowling boy is getting better. So I thought I would slam his other hand in the car door. He was getting in the back seat, I was shutting the front door. Should not have been a problem. Somehow he had his hand out of his open door and into the door slot for the front door. It cut a finger and he cried but no hospital visit. I am definitely moving up the list of horrible parents.
I got my car back after a month. Looks all shiny and clean. I think I even got a fancier looking dash. Could be that it is just clean. Who knows. Watch out deer. You have been warned.
Lastly my back was jacked up last week. I was down for a couple days. On Saturday the wife took all the kids to hockey and I laid on the couch with a heating pad and the dog and watched tv. It was nice. Back still hurt. So that afternoon I went to the store and bought a Salonpas back pad. It is like a huge bandaid that gets hot and supposedly makes you feel better. It might have worked, who knows. But I know when the wife tried to unstick this thing from my back, I almost died. The pain it caused, was horrible. She was pulling it off at an inch at a time rate. I was yelling at her and she was laughing. Finally I pushed her away and yanked this infernal thing off in one fell swoop. Steve Carell in the 40 Year Old Virgin had nothing on this. Needless to say, the other two pads I bought are still in the wrapper.
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