Bowling Is Bad

So after the follow up visit to the orthopedics, the little trooper needed surgery. The fingernail bed had popped up out of his finger. So they cut him open, jammed it in and sewed him up. He was still a little warrior until he got out of the surgery.

Then I guess he showed a little emotion.


The first picture is him chilling in the hospital bed, having fun.


The second is him in the recovery room.


The last is him in his room again, starting to feel the pain.

Waring equals Yummy

As an update to the previous post. Here is the fryer we used. It is from Waring and sold at BJ's for the low, low cost of $59.99. Better get those corn dogs ready.


Here is a link just in case you want it right now.

Updates

As a few of you have already heard, the little man broke his finger over the weekend. The wife was on duty so I am in the clear. The nurse practitioner at the hospital called it 'an open fracture'. I call it a busted up digit. He was at a bowling outing and tripped carrying a ball. The ball squished his finger and split the bone at the tip of his finger. It also jacked up his nail on that finger. Today is a visit with the orthopedist. I am really going to reach my $2200. deductible early this year. He was a trooper and didn't cry at all at the hospital. And he must have been so cute (just like dad) that the nurse ushered us in past a waiting room full of waiting people. Ohhhh, they must have been bitter. I didn't look back.

The dog is a total terror. We had two other Huskies before. One was a dream as a puppy, the other a total nightmare. Can you guess which this dog acts like?? She cries whenever she is put in the cage and likes to pee in the house. I can understand if I don't take the dog out, she might pee on my floor. But I take the beast out, she pees, then comes in and pees again. WTF?? So when I get her out of the cage in the morning it would be wet on her towel and the newspapers. I figured she had to go at night. Then if I went anywhere and come home maybe an hour later, the stuff would still be soaked. Dog can't have to go that much. I figured out what it is. She gets to howling and whining and gnawing at the cage. All the liquid???? She is foaming at the mouth. Unbelievable. Drooling all over the cage to escape. And I paid money for this? But she sure is cute.

The weekend before last we had a birthday party for one of the kids. Now I know it seems like we are always having a birthday party for one of the kids. We are, because we have lots of kids. So the wife plans the party at 2pm. She thinks we won't have to feed all the family. Oh I forgot to mention this was just a family party because I have to choke up money for the little princess to have an ice skating party during the week with her friends. So I tell the wife, it is like this. You can't take food from these animals, they have come to expect it. I tried to get her to understand it in relative terms. I told her they would like Ebone the first time he came back from Thailand and got a massage over here. At the end of the massage the lady said your are done and Ebone said 'What???????'. Then I tried to tell her it is like playing poker at EBones house and not waking up to eggs, bacon, waffles, fruit and juice. I would go nuts. (BTW, Ebone, don't let that ever happen). She was still not comprhending. Finally I said it is like you go to the mall and there is nothing for you to buy. She finally got the picture. We ended up serving food. I busted out chicken wings. They were a big hit. I think I ended up making some cash for the maker of my fryer. There were several inquiries about it and a possible purchase too.

I still haven't talked to Nosaj since the Packers lost in the playoffs. He hasn't called so he might actually be dead. At least he didn't owe me any money.

Lumpy should feel a little better today. I talked to one other person that is going through a detox program right now. If you don't know what that is, it is a bottle of pills you take to make you crap a lot and feel better. Lumpy loves a good detox program. So this person doesn't want me to mention his name. But you can still secretly laugh at him and his many bathroom visits he is paying $30 for. I have my own detox program. I call it chicken wings with hot sauce.

New Addition

And as hard as it is for you to imagine, it is not another baby. This time.

WTF

I know Lumpy and Nosaj are insane but WTF??

Quick Golf Notes

I can always tell who wins the weekly golf match between Nosaj and the father-in-law. Whoever calls me on Saturday evening for no apparent reason.

Golf winner: Hey.

Me: Hey.

GW: What's new?

Me: Nada. How about you?

GW: Well let me tell you. I beat the crap out of him. He cheated, I am awesome. I hit awesome shots and he smells.

Me: I think you have the wrong number.

I was thinking about these weekly calls when I talked to my dad yesterday. He told me he had poison ivy real bad. Since he lives in a old folks neighborhood with 1/64 of an acre for land, I asked how in the heck he got the ivy. He goes on with this elaborately planned scenario. It seemed like a 48 hours mystery.

Supposedly he is out playing golf with other old people. He gets up near the green. I break in and ask him if the course is a little unkempt. Is there ivy on the green? He goes on that he noticed they just bush hogged a portion of the woods. He noticed a bunch of golf balls over there. So he grabs about thirty balls to give to my kid. OK. I am buying it so far. Then, somehow, a few holes later his cart dies. The pro shop brings him another cart and he forgets all the found balls on the dead cart. Then he gets home and realizes he has bad poison ivy and no golf balls.

I would have just said, I played bad and took a bunch of shots from the woods. But that is just me.

Hunter Jiggy

I have taken up hunting. I used to think it was a horribly boring hobby. You sit in the woods for hours or days hoping to only glimpse a poor defenseless animal and take a shot at it. Ebone does it all the time and never really seems to kill anything. So I have surmised that he is not really hunting but just leaving town for weeks at a time to do who knows what with who knows who. However, I have taken hunting to the next level. I just cruise down the street and plow into the animals with my little car. Now this might not be the best hunting technique but I got one last week. How about you Ebone?


And as you can tell I let the boys at my old job know about it. Being the caring souls they are, they decided to let Photoshop tell my story. Glad you guys are busy.

Happy, Happy New Year

The first funny story of the New Year happened at 12:18 A.M. As Nosaj and Mrs. Nosaj were gathering their gear to take demon baby Nosaj home, Mrs. Nosaj's phone rings. They didn't get it in time so we listened to the message. Ever insecure Nosaj got crazy when the caller says 'Hey honey. Don't call my home number too late. Just wanted to say Happy, Happy New Year. See you soon.' So of course he calls back and of course it turns out to be a wrong number. But it was minutes of pure laughter for me.



The boys at the hockey game.



The wreaths that kept falling off while I was hanging them up. They have all been up for two weeks without a drop though. I must have done something right.



The Christmas card. If you didn't get one, just print this out and hang it on your fridge.


Last night we kept the holidays going. We invaded a house. After a couple of beers, I used the restroom facilities. Always the jokester, I inquired if they had a plunger. Lo and behold, 10 minutes later I really needed a plunger (and when I say I, I really mean the homeowner because I wasn't plunging it.) as one of the kids jacked up the toilet. I don't know if we will be invited back. There was another family there so I can hope it was one of their kids.